Dear Taj (our fan),

We haven’t been as startlingly prolific as we’d originally intended. Apologies for our misstep. We want to make it up to you, however, by providing you with a brand new feature that we hope will make you laugh and question the nature of the human body.

A theme of this feature is punishment. The schedule, the content, your experience: it will all be a punishing ordeal in the pursuit of health and well-being.

I’m afraid I’ve said too much.

So, to our little candelabra, Taj, pop a block of wax into the melter, sit back and relax. Shit’s about to get educational.


Your Vigil-Aunties